HOT BANANAS

WELL YOU DON'T GET THIS ON JET 2 DO YA!

'Welcome to a truly sensory and culinary experience' - Dans Le Noir

Wet banana wants to share this unbelievably unique restaurant in London, where individuals will experience eating and drinking in a new light or shall we say NO LIGHT. Dans le noir offers a surreal yet incredible dining experience in which customers dine in complete darkness, interested? You should be, not even mobile phone lights are allowed to help you see what foods your putting into your mouth, so what you waiting for? Wet banana says Check it out and experience eating top foods with a twist !!!!!

http://london.danslenoir.com/

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

MADE IN CHELSEA LOOK ALIKES,YA EFFIN CARROTS

When fat women judge less fat women for wanting to lose weight!!!!! -(please note we do not want to offend any person over-weight just judgmental obese individuals)

So went to a weight watchers tonight, not over-weight but wanted to lose a few pounds so I can have a BOD (body of death) for summer. Not sure why the morbidly obest chicken neck women in there thought it was ok to throw shot put eyes and shake there head at me like miss trunchaball. Previous to this point I didn’t judge you or give a shit about you but now I’M F*KING P*SSED OFF !!! just because I have not spent the past 20 years binging on everything in my reach including the bath bars in the bathroom, it does not mean I don’t have the right to feel unconfident about my body. So to all these cocky hippo’s please keep your over-opinated mr blobby bellys out my face unless you want me to shove your daily dosage of 20 big mac’s up your arse !!!!!!!!

DEAR PRO-ACTIVE…

We all know about the current recession that is affecting our economy BUT we re finding it incredible difficultly to understand, unless you are holding auditions in the dark, how in gods name having Gabrielle Ellis as the spokesperson for your brand would be remotely profitably. We know times are hard and all the b*llshit but if you had contacted the wet banana time we could have easily found a more attractive and less fucking irritating spokesperson at the local dogs home, no offence to the dogs!! I feel truly distraught that my stunning vision of rainbows has now been crushed thanks to Gabrielle using 20 different dyes to convert those rat-tails into a bigger joke than kim karshians and kris humprisies marriage!!! In conclusion I’m sure she’s a lovely person but we at wet banana could have used the money you paid her more wisely than this shocking music video…. But hey lets all hope she uses the money to get some braces n sort that under-bite…don’t worry wet banana rating is a 10!!!!!!

Send me a pic babe, SEND YOUR MUM A PIC!!!!

So we’ve all had one of these moments... where you’re having a nice casual, non-sexual conversation with a guy and then he goes and ruins it all by dropping the ‘P’ bomb... ‘send me a PICTURE’,  wow congratulations, absolute CONVERSATION KILLER!!! What do u want a picture of mate?! The fucking dead tree in my front garden, the sloppy shit i just did in my toilet?! Because the only person thats getting a picture of my titts is YA FUCKING MUM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Nice car, UGLY GUY

CAN’T COPE with all these WET BANANA GUYS that look like they’ve been repeatedly bashed in the face with a smelly fish filled frying pan, yet seem to think just because they have a nice car... they suddenly become  David Beckham. NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You’re just as ugly in that car as you were when u walked down you’re non -existent drive way to get in it. Unfortunately the range rover team have not yet invented windows that completely change the appearance of your face to the outside world.  Sorry guys!